Elephants

Goddamn elephants. What the hell.

Sick Day

I was sick today.
I watched a bunch of 30 rock and played fable 3.
Menu:
Blueberry waffles
Jello
Fruit snacks
Tortillas with cheese
Chocolate half-n-half
Pasta
Orange juice
More tortillas with cheese
More chocolate half-n-half
More jello
Medicine
Water
Exercise:
None

The Turtle King

Turtles, they are everywhere. Don't think you can run, don't think you can hide. They will find you. They will slowly pick off your family one by one, mysterious deaths strangely caused by gnawed off heads. At each crime scene there will be a simple picture, a picture of a turtle. You might not even notice it but, in each picture, the turtle has a small smile crawling across its face. Like a serpent, a serpent of death.

How is this possible? You ask. It is all due to me, the Turtle King. I command the turtle army and they obey me with their entire existence. The only way to save yourself and your family will be to recommend this blog to your friends and family and remind them how the Turtle King spared their lives.

Shirts

Go to samirshop.spreadshirt.com. I sell shirts. And one hat. It says "Awesome".
please buy something, I am poor.